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A Soliloquy of Self: An Ode to the Confusion of Self

Right now, I am experiencing the material world. I am watching, observing, and living. I watch how many people lack loyalty. I watch as people take advantage of others. I watch as I get roped into enjoying the finer things in life and the system of luxury that keeps my inner knowing farther away from me. And I enjoy it.

Life and all its variations

I like to think that I am learning a little something about life and human nature. I am learning that people are really different and it's in the recognition of that difference that love and understanding emerges.

I experienced an ego death, and now, I seek a soul retrieval

Soul loss is a little like you are more aware now, and you are seeing your shadow and flaws and fears and your judgements and projections but you don't know how to stop it. It's like the voices are so much and so jumbled up that you want to scream. It's like physically hearing the chatter and you are behind a door or in a cage but you can't quite see. You just know that you are misplaced. Like trying to look straight in your head, in your brain, in your mind but you can't. You can't quite focus. You are just lost. Holding on. And that's what makes you exhausted. When you are lost but you have gained so much self confidence that you can only hold on and pray that you can help yourself back up.

Self Awareness is a little shitty sometimes and that’s okay. Plus, healing isn’t linear.

By @healingbyemma on Instagram Being self aware is a shitty, overrated process because all your flaws and faults and shadows are laid out on a platter of gold for you to view and criticize. I've gone from not feeling my emotions to having them come in waves. I blame the lunar eclipse being in Taurus.... Continue Reading →

On Working Through A Spiritual Lesson

1. You get to ground zero. You could not be getting as much customers as before, you could run out of money, it feels like square one but not really. This is the ground zero stage. The stage where you have to relax, reflect, and reset your goals. Determine what has been working and what... Continue Reading →

On Sex not being the only form of intimacy

I am asexual. And I love it. It's like I see people but I have no ability to sexualize them. When I had sex, it was either because we were together or I wanted to raise my body count. It was all fun and games. But I was truly genuinely bored. Then I got a... Continue Reading →

Awareness, a quest for knowledge and a knowing beyond what I know

I think the greatest thing about being self aware is that you are constantly learning and growing. That's what it's about. Noticing your thinking patterns, noticing your negative thoughts, noticing how you are always falling into the space of the past or the future. That's one thing I'm working on—remaining in the now. It's currently... Continue Reading →

Life is about balancing between doing and flowing

I kind of want to scream a little bit. I screamed into my pillow earlier this morning. Working off the energy of the full moon, I did an intention setting/spell craft ritual. Then I pulled some tarot cards for the coming month. Let's just say that it was a manifestation ritual. And it made me... Continue Reading →

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